Introducing Your Characters
Everyone knows drunken monkeys are hilarious but also that first impressions count. We all remember the uh, unforgettable screen entrances of Captain Jack Sparrow, Dr. Hannibal Lecter and Tina Carlyle (Cameron Diaz) in The Mask (amongst many other classics), but how does one repeat their success without being accused of plagiarism?
Well, key to any great entrance is being true to that character, and then putting a spin on it. If your leading lady walks into a restaurant and turns heads, that’s great, but also have her turn stomachs and voilà you have a scene of mass projectile vomiting. Tricks like these will set your script apart.
Of course one can use the Dan Brown method — “[Robert Langdon is] Harrison Ford in tweed” — which is genius and conveys so much with no discernible effort used at all. But while it is possible to describe any character in this way (”Jessica Rabbit is Harrison Ford in drag,” “ET is Harrison Ford naked, and suffering palsy,” etc.) there are other effective styles of writing.
For example:
VINNIE BAGO sneers and downs a tequila. He slams the shot glass on the bar counter and it EXPLODES — not the glass, BUT THE WHOLE FUCKING BAR!!! Vinnie walks out of the burning rubble, ON FIRE, but he doesn’t give a shit. He just lights up his CUBAN and CRACKS his neck. Oh yeah!
In this scene we are introduced to 85 year old Vincent Bago. A frail constipated man, this simple yet effective description communicates succinctly and poetically a man in love.
Another great introduction, this time conveying a more alluring quality –
SHEILA BLIGE, 20s, walks naked towards the camera and winks. Then she turns and bends over. Winks. Then she lies down and wraps both ankles round her head. Winks.
It captures a certain magic Sheila possesses and insists you pay attention. It also tastefully says this woman is comfortable with her femininity and probably practices ashtanga yoga.
PROFESSOR KICKASS, 40s, twirls — savouring the operatic music that echoes in his opulent study where there’s enough room to swing a cat, which is what he’s doing.
Here, we immediately understand that Professor Kickass is an evil psychopath (and thus European) due to his obvious wealth and penchant for opera. Yet the clever dichotomy here is in the addition of him swinging a screaming cat above his head which says “this is a guy I’d like to party with.”
Finally, the best-friend or side-kick is always a tough character to set-up right, especially without overshadowing your more important leads. Yet, below is a perfect example of striking the right balance:
HEIDI VODKA, 40, SCREAMS into the mirror, then laughs, then screams, then laughs and sobs, then hoists up her skirt and wees on the floor.
An evocative example of wonderful understated writing, brimming with subtext. Heidi is a unique individual and her role of fat, retarded best friend is just one aspect of her.
So, by applying these examples it is possible to outdo even the best Hollywood has to offer and help make your script not only a great read but a superb late night cable TV movie.
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